Saturday, 26 April 2014

False Alarm & TMI

I am hoping for an un-medicated delivery. I prefer to say "un-medicated" instead of "natural" because I don't think women who choose pain relief during their vaginal deliveries have unnatural deliveries - the baby is still coming out the same way. I don't know if other people are as concerned with semantics as I am, but words and their implied or perceived meanings matter a lot to me. I'm sure it is because of the years I spent trying to adopt. Sometimes when I'd tell people we were in the adoption process, they would say things that I found offensive, even though I know they weren't intended to be. Questions such as "Why adopt? don't you want to have kids of your own?"  Inappropriate things people say to adoptive families has led to some great videos that, while funny, educate the general public about how to approach adoptive families without being offensive. Like this one:

**Warning** From here on out, this post is definitely sharing too much information about bodily functions/fluids. If you aren't into talking about that kind of stuff (I'm looking at you Juan) feel free to turn away now. You've been fairly warned ;)

So despite the fact that I am hoping for an un-medicated delivery, I am not afraid of the pain. What I am afraid of is tearing and my hemorrhoids. I am so scared of tearing, even though I feel like it's bound to happen. I can't think of one woman I know in real life who didn't require a few stitches after they gave birth. But whenever I think of the delivery I worry about tearing. And my hemis. I've had them for more than 10 years and they've never really bothered me before because they aren't painful. Unfortunately, a hemi appeared yesterday and it has definitely been uncomfortable. All through the night when I woke up to pee last night I immediately noticed that my hemi was still sore. 

So this morning, I was in the kitchen and I felt a sudden gush of fluid. It felt exactly like when you get your period with heavy flow except more. Not enough to make me think "holy shit my water just broke!" but enough to make me think "What the hell was that?" I went straight to the bathroom to check, and the fluid was clear. I know it wasn't pee (I won't go into details about how I know, but you'll just have to take my word for it that I know, okay?) and then called Andino to the bathroom saying "Come here, I want to show you something".  He was afraid to come, but I assured him that I wasn't going to show him my hemi. (Which I've done before. Nothing says mystery and romance in a marriage like making your partner look at your hemorrhoids!)  So he came and I showed him the big wet spot on my panties and told him I thought it was amniotic fluid. I thought he'd start freaking out (he's really nervous about the delivery) but he didn't. He just kept asking me to call my midwife. I wanted to wait it out and see what happened over the next few hours but I gave in and called her just to calm Andino's mind. 

My midwife asked what colour the fluid was and if I thought my waters had broken. I told her I didn't think so and that I was only calling because Andino was nervous. She asked if I had any pain or pressure (I didn't) and if the baby was still moving (she was). She told me not to take any baths and to abstain from intercourse. She said I should call her back if I soak through a pad or if baby's movements decrease. Andino and I went on with our plans for the day and there's been no more fluid and baby's been moving so I think we are in the clear. But you know what my first thought was when we were talking about my waters breaking? "No, I can't go into labour until my hemorrhoid goes away!" 

Even though I still think baby's going to keep cooking for at least another couple weeks, Andino and I are going to spend the weekend working on all the little chores that we want done before baby arrives. (And when I say "Andino and I" I mean I made a list and he's doing the chores - God love him!) 


  1. I believe in gratuitous grossness. Seriously. Just put it all out there. :-) I frequently surf the net for more on my secretions. Used to think that the only thing that would come of my vagina was the baby after several months, but not such luck as that.
    I hope your baby stays put for a while, but good to hear you are organized for her arrival!

  2. You are so right, it is important to be open to whatever kind of birth may happen. I am the type of person where if I get my heart absolutely set on something and then it doesn't happen I get really disappointed. As much as I am hoping for my delivery to go a certain way, I want to keep reminding myself that you never really know what is going to happen.

    I have heard that if you listen to what the midwife is telling you, that can reduce the risk of tearing. I've also heard that certain pushing positions make it more likely to tear than others. I hear squatting in particular can be bad for tears. I think I want to try pushing on all fours, but I am going to do some more research.

    The midwife called me back in the afternoon to see how I was doing. I told her I was sure it wasn't pee and she didn't think it was amniotic fluid, so I asked her what she thought it was. She said she thought it was just discharge, but that at this stage your discharge can get quite watery and abundant. I'm glad it wasn't amniotic fluid because I want to keep cooking her for another couple weeks yet!

    Thanks for such a nice comment girlfriend :)

  3. Sorry to hear about the hemi, if it makes you feel better you're definitely not alone tons of pregnant women get them from the hormone fluctuations and there's a lot of them!

    About the discharge, I had the same kind of thing happen in late pregnancy, it was very uncomfortable when it started happening more frequently; I was worried at first as well.

    Also for some strange reason whenever I see TMI I want to read on. I think I'm starting to get the same kind of sense of humour as you! :) I think it's from working in the supplement industry for so long. I get a weird sense satisfaction from talking about things that make other people feel uncomfortable, herpes, hemorrhoids, colon cleansing, etcetera... bring it on! lol :)

    1. I'm glad to know I am not the only one who has unexplained discharge! haha

      And I totally agree that working in the supplement industry made me much more comfortable discussing things that others would find inappropriate. I remember at first I felt awkward talking about those things too and by the end I could discuss the details of our male enhancement products no problem! Our family dinners will never be boring, that's for sure! haha

  4. First, that video is great. What a good analogy. Second, I ditto the above comment that if there is a chance of it being amniotic fluid, it's better to be safe than sorry for the risk of infection. Be cautious! And finally, I was there for 3 of my sister's 4 births and she didn't have any tearing in any of them. She is a rock star when it comes to having babies vaginally and un-medicated! I don't know if that offers you any comfort at all, but just know there is at least a chance of there not being any tearing! You will do great, I have no doubts :)

  5. Hemis! Omg that's an adorable nickname for a not-so-adorable thing... but I love that you're open enough to share them with your husband, that definitely reminds me of Eric and me (I say it's not true love until you've applied hemorrhoid cream to each other's butts, so in our case... yeah, we're covered). Ha!

    Anyway, I've been thinking about my birth plan a lot lately mostly because I really don't have one... but I've always known I wanted an epidural just based on witnessing my sister both before and after for all three of her deliveries. Like night and day! But I've been thinking wouldn't it be so funny if I went in thinking I wanted one and then ended up not getting one. The one thing it does is slow everything down, and I have a feeling I'll want to get it done as quickly as possible. But really, who knows.

    Discharge still freaks me out, I always think it's gonna be blood or fluid or that something's wrong. I don't know if I'll ever get over that. Glad to hear they weren't concerned and that you get to keep cooking that little one!

  6. I'm so glad it was just a false alarm mama x

  7. Grrr! I haven't seen your posts in my feed for some reason!! I'm catching up now...PS. I love TMI! :)


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